Mojo Makers CONNECT: Chapter 1

Don't Create Content...
Create Connection

Growing up I never went on vacations, so when my mother-in-law asked if I wanted to go on an all-expense paid getaway, I was like...

“oh! Heck Yeah!”

I pictured my dream vacation. Me, chilling in some excluded nature surrounding the beachfront resort.

I arrived a few months later to find my dream was more like my nightmare.

It was Nothing Like What I Expected.

The first day we arrived, I got to the hotel, dropped my bags and immediately headed to the beach.

Instead of being tucked away secluded. It was packed with people. It seemed like there were more bodies than sand.

When the sun went down, I hoped for a better experience. So I decided to push through the discomfort and go to see a show. I put on a new dress, and a fresh face, and I hit the strip determined to have a good time.

More People, More Problems

When I walked out of the hotel, I noticed the streets were 10x more crowded than the beach.

My claustrophobia kicked into high gear.

Everything in me screeched to head back to the room. But instead of turning around I took a deep breath and powered through.

Step by step, I kept walking towards the Big Hotels where the show was being held.
When I got to the main part of the strip. There was a whole bunch of street promoters lined up in two rows. One row on each side of the crowd.

It looked like a Soul Train line.
But I felt more like I was a sheep going towards the slaughter.

The closer I got the more anxious I felt.

SLAP!...

My eyes widened.

“What the HECK was that!!”
It sounded like a loud smacking sound that pinged my ears.

“SLAP!!”… there it went again.

I looked toward the sound and briefly locked eyes with one of the advertisers.

He quickly seized the moment.

"This special is for YOU only!” as he pushed a flyer my way.

The street advertisers one after another, were making loud slapping noises smacking their flyers against their hands while calling out loud mutterings to get my attention.

SLAP! “Ladies free tonight!”
SLAP… “For one night ONLY.
SLAP, The one and only...No show like this!”

The interruptions felt endless. I swiftly went from, “No, no thank you. Sorry, not this time” to a focused mantra of “Just ignore them, just ignore them, don’t make eye contact!”

I’m not sure if it was the smoke in the air or all of the fast-paced commotion... but the more I walked the more queasy I felt.

Done with Social

Many years later, I felt this same type of queasy every time I visited social media. It was all too fast, too busy, and too much. It left me exhausted
and ready to give the whole thing up.

But right before I did. I decided to do an experiment.

But First a Test...

Instead of shutting down my online accounts, I intentionally stayed open to exploring different types of connection opportunities both on and offline. 



I was on the hunt to ‘find my people’.

For the next few months, I intentionally walked through the world with my heart and eyes open. Actively searching for what ‘community” meant for me. 


It was a lot of hit-and-miss. There was a lot of noise and meaningless chatter. But every now and again I'd just so happen to stumble across a nourishing space that sloooooowed me doooooown instead of speeding me up.

The few oases I found early on, felt like a balm to my soul. They kept me open, hopeful, and on the lookout for even more opportunities to create meaningful connection.

A Different Experience

Thinking back to some of these cozy online spaces and how they made me feel reminded me of another time I visited Nevada. The same State I visited way back on the gifted vacation I shared about earlier.

The busyness was the same. The loud billboards, flashing lights, and slapping to get my attention were the same. However, the conversations and bliss I felt were different.

Same Noise, Different Community

This time my overall experience was very different. Instead of being a tag along with my in-laws, I was with an intentional group of friends whom I adored. 

It was me, my husband, and a handful of my comedian friends who kept me laughing in tears the whole time! Every experience we had felt like an adventure.

I had such a great time that when I got home all I could think about was planning the next time I could do it all over again!

The memories I have of these two experiences are polar opposites. Even though they happened in the same place.

For the latter one, my being fully present in joy with people whom I enjoy somehow made ALL of the outside mayhem and noise vying for my attention irrelevant.

Both times the noise and chaos were the same, but the quality of connection was different.

Content Connection is less about avoiding the noise and more about creating oases where you and your people can connect online around the things you care about.

An omission

Even though I LOVE creating community through content, I still feel overwhelmed when I surf social media.

The who not the what

When I'm lost in the sea of noise my consistency dwindles and I have to remind myself to focus on the people I want to connect with and the ideas I want to have conversations with them about. Then I purposely tune out noise and amplify my attention toward the who instead of the what.

When I focus in this way, the fear, dread, and hesitation fade into the background. My angst is replaced with excitement. Not because the environment has changed but because my perspective has changed. Focusing on Connection instead of Content was and is a game changer for me.

REFLECTION:

1. Do you ever feel burnt out from trying to connect online? When does this tend to happen? What are the circumstances surrounding these experiences?
2. What or who brings you joy, makes you laugh, and lights your fire?
3. How might you center your online experience around these things? How might you create a thriving community that fuels

🏕️ In the Wild Action Challenge:

1. Explore
Go to a live event that looks promising. (It can be online or in-person)


2. Notice
While you’re there notice which parts of the event draw you in and which parts leave you inching toward the door. 



3. Use & Fuse
Use what you’re noticing to help you make intentional decisions about the type of online content and experiences you’ll create. Write a list of possible micro experiments Take some time to try them out with a few of your people.